How do the students in class see me? What am I a symbol of? For many, many years I have thought of myself as a person who slipped into the Awards Show or the Ball by accident, or unlawfully through the backdoor or the servants entrance.
I have seen myself as Cinderella
At the ball through magic, enchantment, luck or blessing.
The photographer is on her way. Time to get a new action shot of me in the class for the brochures for my textbooks. I ask the class for help. “I need you to help me sculpt my image into what is most useful for the people who read these books. I need a task force of people in these rooms to help me represent myself as what is needed in the mind of the student. Hence, how I see myself is not as important as how YOU all need to see me. How can I represent myself in this picture that will help you?”
Seeing myself as Cinderella, perhaps, does not help anyone.
Representing myself as a many in class, up at 7am on another Sunday Morning to reach and teach people who are anxious about their future is what is needed.
Another day to polish my art. My 18th year in classes for board review and I feel like I am just getting started. The book tour coming up for ‘Routine Miracles” makes me feel like everything has been preparation.
I feel more passionate to get at the meaning of things now, than I did before. Before, I needed to look good. To not look stupid in class.
Now I need to get at the meaning of things. to see the connections more deeply. Like I am an inch away from a sip of an answer. Almost can wet my lips on THE TRuth.
Deeper, so that when the 50 people in the room leave, a few will think about the fact that maybe I am right.
Maybe they ARE better than Doctors in the past
Maybe they CAN be the one to find the cure, the breakthrough, the ability to eradicate the disease. Maybe we really are incredibly fortunate to have this chance.
Nearly there. A passionate energy illuminates my soul today. Teaching in a class that does not look different from the tens of thousands of students I have been with before.
There is something about asking for help on the presentation of “Routine Miracles” that has really helped me see myself more objectively, how the students see me and that there just isn’t anyone to talk about these issues.
About their excellent and noble qualities and about the responsibility they have to care for a a suffering humanity.
And the students, interestingly, have told me exactly the same thing.
Like today “You are like a Vulgar Mother Theresa”